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Work in Progress "I'll be done any day now!" - Still-Being-Drawnism This page is not done yet and may still contain inaccurate information or miss important details. |
“Did I cook? But anyways, do you guys think I cooked?”
P. “Volker41” Schäfer (2016-2024)
“LEGAL DISCLAIMER!!! Volker41ism is a 100% legal ideology that rejects any form of violence. Volker41 is not legally responsible for what trolls might do or say while pretending to either be him or support him. Volker41 himself would never engage in any acts of violence and seeks the common good only through legal activism and writing.”
Lolcowism is not an ideology, but rather a term for internet users who are constantly mocked by other users due to their stupid actions and doesn't know why they are being mocked. There's a difference between 
Lolcows and 
Trolls, since Trolls are always ironical and for most of the time have the purpose of making people laugh while Lolcows doesn't have this purpose and are often serious in their actions.
Current Polcompball Lolcows
N.Brio da Zuera/Javi Coelho
Main article:
N.Brioism.
“Everyone who thinks I am a bait needs to be tortured in the worst way imaginable.”
N.Brio da Zuera, real name Alan Augusto da Silva, is a Brazilian (though he denies being Brazilian for some reason) internet troll who recently joined the FPCB community and became an active member, often arguing, with slurs and insults, against everyone who disagrees with him.
He started his history in internet at the end of 2016, with the name "Ivlis da Zueira", and later evolved to become N.Brio da Zuera in the early 2018's. He was known for attacking popular fandoms (including the DDLC fandom) and being toxic and edgy.
He created his account in Polcompball in early 2023, at PCBA, where he created his page but it was deleted by a former lolcow, Person 16384, during the banwave to later recreate his page in FPCB. His first account wasn't actually him, but another former lolcow named Killer Kitty, but the real N.Brio da Zuera joined due to the influence of the fake account of Killer Kitty, but some accused him, the true account, of being a fake account owned by Killer Kitty, which was revealed false. He is known for engaging in fights with another users, mainly CubanCatholicFalangist and MinoritySlayer.
Volker41
Main article:
“The kikes cannot control me — because I am — Aryan and I resisted and this is why — they are sending the — trolls to harass me and silence me, and its also because of the fact that — I’m Pro-Palestine.”
Volker41 is a latinx brown natsoc that the Free Polcompball community knows and loves. He frequently spends his time on the Discord server talking about hating the Jews and supporting Palestine and how Jesus was aryan or something, Idk. Volker is also known for getting unfunny slop on the server starboard, though his cult following will likely try to convince you otherwise.
Common Volker behavior would include proclaiming that he is white (his ethnic makeup is 25% Dutch, 25% Spanish, 25% Italian, and 25% redskin) despite living in Colombia. He also may have watched too much Europa: The Last Battle; he believes that Hitler was a wholesome anti-racist and loved shitskins or smth. Volker’s hatred of Jews apparently comes from the fact that he was molested by a Jew when he was 10 years old.
Volker has also been accused of watching child pornography (due to his unhealthy obsession with Madoka Magica) and beastiality ever since Polcompball user HEW introduced him to My Little Pony. Well, the latter may be true. Due to these reasons, the Free Polcompball Discord server commonly refers to him as a lolcow, but he believes that the users who make fun of him are trolls sent by Mossad/the CIA.
Dony/Dark Egg Chocolate Bowser
“NO DONY!”
Dony, also known as DarkEggChocolateBowser, is an infamous user of Free Polcompball due to his often annoying and copycat personality, his love for creating low-quality pages (most of the time they are copied from the other wikis or they are just a single paragraph), as well as his black-and-white view of the world regarding politics. He got the nickname "Dony" after misspelling the word "don't" after being warned of another "Donyless Hour"[4]. The full phrase was "no don't" with capslock on.
There are many rumors and controversies involving DECB, one of these theories claimed DECB might actually be an alternative account of 
MugiKotobuki larping as a 
liberal. This theory started because many pointed out the fact that, at the time, DECB was creating many pages of far-right ideologies and his "people opnions" sections only had far-right ideologues (ranging from politicians to activists, dictators, war criminals and school shooters). But after many accusations got him to remove most people who were in his page.
Other rumor was that he is a pedophile because of a screenshot with Galaxy where DECB asked what they age his, and after Galaxy claimed he was 10, DECB posted a photo of two mens kissing. Though some claim this screenshot was fake, and this include 
MrNoNonsense (the creator of the Anti-Dony Aktion) who admitted this screenshot was fake.
Galaxy
“Nietzsche isn't a nihilist?”
Andrew Galaxious 
, also known as Aperson14, Sue, Edelex, or simply just Galaxy, is a Peruvian-Canadian user on Free Polcompball commonly known for ideology shopping (more information on that is on the 
Ismism page). Xhe goes by xhe/xer pronouns due to Galaxy being transgender, so please respect them for a more friendly and engaging community. Galaxy is also commonly called Edelex, referencing another Free Polcompball user, due to their uncanny similarities.
Besides ideology shopping, Galaxy is also known for xer unusual activities on the Free Polcompball Discord server and its associate servers. Such activities would be xer sexually fantasizing about Albertan oil drillers or when Galaxy has posted selfies of xerself with the caption that xhe is “plapping to myself”. Some worse cases would be when Galaxy has indirectly stated that xhe wanted to fuck xer sister, or when xhe sent a pornographic gif to a 11 year old boy from Czechia named Nate Higgers. Due to these activities and many more, Galaxy is commonly referred to as a lolcow.
Oh, and Galaxy disguised as Quark to ERP with Yugo, that’s the real truth.
Cholera Camel
“I agree!”
Cholera Camel is a massive faggot and an active user of the Free Polcompball Discord server. WIP.
Volt
“GUYS IM NOT AUTISTIC STOPPPPPPP”
Volt is an user most active in the Oroverse and its surrounding communities, however he was introduced to the Free Polcompball Discord server by Jefbol. He is notable for being severely mentally challenged. He tried to defend his argument of primitive communism being capitalist in nature because of private property with The Flintstones, which has a record of 29 stars on the starboard. Aside from that, he is infamous for being unfunny and overall mentally challenged, along with being ugly as FUCK and unironically getting off to Skibidi Toilet.
He is also known in the Oroverse for getting mad at other users over calling him autistic, culminating in a war cry of "GUYS IM NOT AUTISTIC STOPPPPPPP".
CubanCatholicFalangist
Main article:
CubanCatholicFalangism.
“Cope is Love, Cope is Life”
CubanCatholicFalangist is a User on the FPCB Wiki known for Attacking N. Brio De Zuera (and by Proxy his Friends like 
Skibidi G-Man) anywhere he goes. He often says Antisemetic, Racist and Homophobic insults, but at the same time has said to support Zionism, LGBTQ+ Rights and indirectly through Falangism Race Mixing.
He is also often seen as a troll, but denies the accusations, he also denies having alts such as BrazilianBuddhistSalazarism and AmericanAtheistMosleyism by Saying that they attack him, but we all know he just uses them to attack himself as well as anything he hates, seeing as they overuse the word 'cope' and do insults in the same manner as him, as well as being all in one timezone.
Former Polcompball Lolcows
Jeff1123
OUR LORD AND SAVIOR LUÍS MIGUEL
“I would prefer the Nazi side than the skibidi side”
Luís Miguel Olivera da Silva is an effeminate shameless sodomite homofascist transvestite a Brazilian Polcompball user and he is literally GOD. He was a brave kid who stood against the lies of the nazifascists, the heretics, and commies to defend his favela traditions of the jungle. It is prophesied that one day, Luís Miguel will come down from the heavens as a savior of the monkey race and smite the shameless montagers back to hell where they came from.
Luís Miguel was also a man of science, only using the non-montaged archives of wikipedia.org and knowing what dinosaurs are. He also spoke out against the false prints, summoning his mother to unleash his wrath on the Free Polcompball server when they were disguising as him. Do not believe the lies that he is pagan, homosexual, or communist, for that is true completely montaged.
In addition to being a man of science, Luís Miguel was a very religious man, believing in the catholic tradition of child marriage and singlehandedly touched all the 330,000 kids in France. As Luis once said: “I wanna fuck the shit out of her”. And finally, Luís Miguel was also an artist, drawing around half of the emojis for the Free Polcompball server, and additionally also once drew shameless sodomites burning in hell.
Leninisbased556
“Whoa”
Leninisbased556 was a retarded mongoloid former PCB/PCBA user before the split between Free Polcompball and Polcompball Wikitide. Despite being an older user than all of the other lolcows on this page, his infamous breakdown would leave a profound impact on Free Polcompball culture. WIP (Jefbol you better work on this)
MugiKotobuki8814
“How about yes, I invite you to my couple, I would like to be your couple. Please.”
